6 months in Sweden
Gosh, that went quickly! 6 months in Sweden, and 2 very different seasons! I commented to Joshua last week that it had been almost half a year since we moved — he did a double take and was quite convinced I’d miscalculated! I’ve double checked the calendar though, and it’s true; 6 months have passed since we packed up our life in Sydney and started a new chapter in Sweden!
Moving to Malmö during a pandemic (which is still very much going on) has been one of the hardest things we’ve done, exceptionally isolating with no real end to look towards. Starting over in a foreign country with minimal language skills, and no support network has been a test in every way. Throwing in a broken limb, a dark winter, house hunting in a pandemic and starting a new job 100% remotely… whew, it’s a lot! It’s been surprising how easy and straightforward some days feel, but how quickly it can feel impossibly hard just a day later. Having had the last two months in our own apartment has made a world of difference, feeling like we have a ‘home’ to be comfortable in and make the space our own. That could also be the positive impacts of retail therapy as it’s felt like all I did for 6 weeks was online shop — my bank balance is glad that the bulk of the shopping has now concluded.
The hardest part of the isolation is not having any way to remedy it. When we had first planned the move, I’d also planned a trip home to Australia in September. With professional projects still ticking along in Oz, I’d thought that having trips back would keep me in contact with my professional network and allow me to promote new projects, and give me a timeframe to look towards to curb any homesickness. I’m incredibly goal oriented (and dislike lack of control) so always flounder when things are outside of my abilities to control. With borders closed on both sides of the seas, our plans to visit have been cancelled and there’s nothing in their place. I’ve struggled with the not-knowing, and am grieving the big life moments of my loved ones that I will miss — new engagements that will lead to weddings that I likely won’t be able to attend, and pregnancies that have no timeframe for when I’ll get to cuddle a squishy new baby (or my dearest friends who will be new parents). I’m grateful for FaceTime and the relative ease that technology allows the maintenance of connection, but there’s no substitute for the real thing.
Some days I feel like we’re not living ‘real life’, that time is suspended and I’m not doing anything. There have been several days (and weeks) where I’ve gotten to Friday and felt quite down at how little I’ve achieved in the days prior. But I think a lot of it is adjusting my expectations and focussing instead on what I have achieved. In the last 6 months we’ve done all of our paperwork to be set up in the Swedish system, utilised the healthcare system including physiotherapy appointments after Joshua broke his hand, we’ve bought an apartment, we’ve renovated and furnished said apartment entirely just the two of us, we’ve completed A1 level of our Swedish language course and are halfway through A2… so, you know, when I type it out I feel like we’ve gotten a fair bit done in our first half year living abroad.
I’m looking forward to things feeling a little more settled from here, knowing we won’t need to move or apartment hunt again, and having a little more free time for exploring outside as the weather continues to warm up into spring. I’m hopeful for more vaccinations happening in the later half of the summer, and crossing my fingers and toes that by the 1 year mark of living here we’ll have been able to travel a little further afield.
